Almost all mitzvot may be enhanced by:

• Making them beautiful (hidur mitzva), or
• Observing non-required stringencies (mehadrin).

Although women and girls are generally exempt from time-dependent positive commandments (mitzvot), they may do some mitzvot for which they are not obligated and it is considered to be virtuous behavior for which they will get a reward. They may say the blessings before each mitzva.

1. These are voluntary mitzvot that women may do:

• Lulav

• Sukka

• Saying the full shema.

2. Women and girls MAY NOT  wear tefilin.

 

3. Women traditionally do not:

• Say tachanun. 

• Wear talit or tzitzit (talit katan).

• Study gemara.

• Say kiddush levana or birkat ha'chama.

But these are not forbidden.

 

Your fore-blessing covers all other same-category foods that you will eat at the same time (same sitting), if:

1. They are in front of you when you say the blessing, OR
2. You intend your blessing to cover all other same-category foods that you own and will eat at the same sitting--even if they are not in front of you when you make the blessing.
   Note You do not need to state your intention out loud, just think it.  If you usually have this intention but you forgot on an occasion, you do not need to say new blessings on the subsequent foods of that type that you already own.

• You say she'hakol over two kinds of she'hakol foods on your table.  The blessing also covers a third she'hakol food in your refrigerator and a fourth in your pantry that you know you own.
• You say she'hakol and are eating an omelette when a visitor brings you a gift of chocolates: you must say a new she'hakol]blessing before eating the chocolates.
  Note Anytime your spouse is serving you food, it is assumed that your initial fore-blessings will cover all food that you will eat.

• Guest at Someone's Home
  Whenever you are a guest at someone else's house, it is assumed that whatever foods you will eat, will be covered by your initial fore-blessing as long as they are in the same category.
• Attendee at Kiddush or Wedding
  If you say she'hakol over fish at a kiddush or wedding, the blessing covers all she'hakol foods in the room.
• Diner in Restaurant
  If you have made an order in a restaurant, all ordered foods will be covered by your first fore-blessing(s). However, if you later order more food, even if the fore-blessings are the same, you must still say a new fore-blessing.

Who Is a Mourner

A mourner is defined in halacha as someone mourning during the 12-month mourning period for parents or the 30-day mourning period for the other five relatives (spouse, brother, sister, son, daughter). After 30 days, one is no longer a mourner for anyone but one's parents.

Mourners' Restrictions

If the mourner goes about business as usual, it may show he or she doesn't care about the close relative who died. The mourner should ideally not want to do these things. The mourner honors the dead person by refraining from pampering him/herself and refraining from going about his or her life as usual.

Public Meals

A mourner may not attend a public meal for any purpose. For example, if the mourner attends a lecture or Torah class at which food is being served, he or she may not eat the food. This only applies to sit-down meals; snacking is permitted.

Siyum/Brit/Bar Mitzva

After 30 days after a parent's burial, a mourner may:

• Attend a siyum or bar mitzva and eat there.
• Attend a brit but not eat there.

Note If there is music (live or recorded), the mourner must leave.

Weddings

A mourner may not eat at a wedding and may not even be in the wedding hall after the ceremony took. The mourner may also not hear the music at a wedding.

Exceptions

• If the mourner is the parent of someone getting married, the mourner can fully participate in the wedding.
• If the mourner is the bride or groom, he or she must normally wait to get married until after shloshim/30 days.

Note If it is after shiva, but still during shloshim, consult a rabbi.

Kiddush and Shabbat or Festival Meals

A mourner may not publicly (noticeably) mourn on Shabbat or festivals so he or she may attend Shabbat or festival meals and kiddushes if he or she would be expected to attend. If the mourner always or routinely invites some person or a lot of different people on Shabbat or festivals, it is still permitted. If the mourner does not routinely invite some person or a lot of different people to a Shabbat or festival meal, then he or she may not, for his or her own enjoyment, invite guests for meals. However, the mourner is permitted to do so for other purposes (for the benefit of the invited person or people), such as kiruv or hachnasat orchim. There is no limit to how many guests the mourner may host.

The mourner may attend or host a sheva brachot in his/her home.

A mourner should not be invited to meals, even for Shabbat or festivals; but if he/she was invited, he/she may go.

Holidays

A mourner does eat at a Purim or Jewish festival seuda, since there is no mourning on Purim nor on any festival (except Chanuka).

Jewish Festivals are listed in the Torah and are of two types: 

1. Three pilgrimage festivals (shalosh regalim):

• Passover,
• Shavuot, and
• Sukkot (including Shimini Atzeret).

These festivals were celebrated in ancient times by "appearing before God"--by bringing offerings to the Tabernacle or Temple.

2. High Holidays: 

• The Jewish New Year (Rosh Hashana—“Yom Teru'a” in the Torah), and the
• Day of Atonement (Yom Kippur).

 
Duration
Jewish holidays that were originally one day are now observed as follows:

• Rosh Hashana--2 days.
• Yom Kippur--1 day.
• Shavuot--1 day in Eretz Yisrael or 2 days elsewhere.
• Passover has festival days at the beginning and end of the holiday and intermediary days of lesser holiness, which are called chol ha'moed. In Eretz Yisrael, Passover lasts for 7 days in total and the first and last days are festival days. Outside of Eretz Yisrael, Passover lasts 8 days and has two festival days at the beginning and two at the end.
• Sukkot has festival days at the beginning and at the end and intermediary days of lesser holiness, which are called chol ha'moed. In Eretz Yisrael, Sukkot lasts for 8 days and the first and last days are festival days (the last day is Shimini Atzeret). Outside of Eretz Yisrael, Sukkot lasts for 9 days and the first two days and last days are festival days (the 8th day is Shimini Atzeret and the 9th day is Simchat Torah).

Character
Each holiday contributes its own character to Jewish life (Passover--the theme of freedom; Yom Kippur brings atonement, etc.). 

Celebrating
How to celebrate these holidays is detailed in our Oral Law and halacha books. Jewish festivals as practiced today are similar in holiness to Shabbat. As with Shabbat, the Jewish festival has candle lighting, kiddush at two meals, and havdala.   We eat our best food and wear our best clothing on Jewish festivals (we eat our next-best food and wear our next-best clothing on Shabbat!).
The main idea behind eating meals on Jewish festivals is joy (simcha), so you should drink wine and eat meat (only if you enjoy wine and meat).  There is no third meal on Jewish festivals since people used to eat two meals each day (adding a third meal on Shabbat was for enjoyment/oneg).
 
Melachot
Any activities or actions permitted on Shabbat are also permitted on the Jewish festivals. Actions that are forbidden on Shabbat are generally also forbidden on Jewish festivals, but there are some leniencies (only if the actions are needed for that festival day).
Examples

• Lighting from an existing flame,
• Cooking and baking for the Jewish festival day, and
• Carrying outside the eruv (hotza'a--transferring objects between domains).

 
Grama
Grama (indirectly causing an action) is permitted on Jewish festivals (but not on Shabbat). For example, you may advance or delay a timer that will make a light go on or off in the future (the timer must already be plugged in and operating from before sunset of the festival day).
Note For an action to be considered indirect based on time, there must be at least 2.5 seconds after the first action is done before the resulting action begins to happen.

Psik Reisha Dla Neicha Lei
Psik reisha dla neicha lei is forbidden on Jewish festivals, just as it is on Shabbat.

D'oraita Restrictions
D'oraita restrictions apply world-wide to:

• First and seventh days of Passover,
• First and eighth days of Sukkot,
• First day of Shavuot,
• Yom Kippur,
• First day of Rosh Hashana.

Note The same restrictions apply to all other Jewish festival days but are rabbinical.
 
Women
In general, women are not required to perform the positive, time-dependent commandments. Women and girls are not required to eat any Jewish festival meals except the Passover seder meal (but they are not allowed to fast on those days).

“Be holy because I, the Lord your God, am holy.” Leviticus/Vayikra 19:2
 
Halacha ("The Way To Go" or "Way to Walk") guides proper Jewish behavior in all aspects of life, each day of our lives--not just in civil laws or court situations. Halacha teaches us how to behave with our families, relatives, and strangers as well as how to fulfill our religious requirements between ourselves and God.

To fulfill our role as a holy people, we imitate God's actions. Examples are visiting the sick, welcoming guests, giving charity, refraining from creative activity on Shabbat, and promoting peace between husband and wife (shalom bayit).

The true reason for following halacha is because God commanded us to do so.  We observe halacha to please our Creator and to become spiritually close to Him by doing His will and imitating His actions.

Like the word for the whole body of Jewish "laws," each rule of how to act is called a halacha (plural, halachot).

Where Do Halachot Come From?

Although you will find halachot on this site that were born only a few days or a few decades ago, the body of halacha has been around since before creation.  "God looked into the Torah and created the world," says the Zohar, and so we find the Patriarchs followed halacha even before that great law book, the Torah, was given on Mount Sinai four centuries later.
 
Many halachot are specified in the Written Torah (Jewish Bible). These halachot correspond to fuller and more detailed halachot given orally (Oral Torah) to Moses on Mount Sinai to explain the Written Torah that he received at the same time. Many halachot could not be understood from the Written Torah without the Oral Law (for example, what should be written on a mezuza scroll?) and many common practices such as making kiddush or what tefilin should look like are to be found nowhere in the Written Torah.
 
Since the Torah applies to all generations, the Torah specifies that there be wise and learned people to decide how to apply halacha to the situations of the day.  Halachot can be found in sourcebooks such as the Mishna, Gemara, their commentaries, Shulchan Aruch, Mishna Berura, and responsa (questions and answers originally sent by letter and now, occasionally, by email or SMS!) of later rabbis.
 
Sometimes a custom becomes a halacha, sometimes not.  For example, the original halacha for tzitzit was that a Jewish man who wears a four-cornered garment must have tzitziyot on each corner.  The custom, which has become universally accepted and now has the force of halacha, is that Jewish men wear a four-cornered garment in order to be able to fulfill the commandment of wearing tzitziyot.  An example of a custom that did not become a halacha is that some men and boys wear their tzitziyot outside of their shirts and pants.

Levels of Halachot

In halacha, there are three levels of what to follow or observe. They are differentiated on this website by the following terms: 

• “Must”:  Halachot that are generally non-negotiable except in extreme situations;
• “Should”:  Customs that have been accepted by the entire Jewish world (or major segments of it) and that may be overridden when necessary, sometimes even if not extreme circumstances; and
• “Non-Binding Custom”:  Customs that are not universally followed and that do not need to be followed except by people who have the tradition to do so.

To say any after-blessing/bracha achrona (al ha'michya, al ha'gafen, al ha'eitz, borei nefashot, or birkat ha'mazon), you must:

• Eat at least the minimum volume (1.3 fl. oz.--39 ml, or 1/6 cup) of solid food within four minutes, or
• Drink at least 3.3 fl. oz. (99 ml) of liquid within 30 seconds.

If Did Not Eat Minimum

Do not say bracha achrona if you did not eat 1.3 fl. oz. (39 ml) within four minutes.

If Did Not Drink Minimum

Do not say bracha achrona if you did not drink 3.3 fl. oz. (99 ml) of any potable liquid within 30 seconds. Note You may not combine the volume of solid food to liquid food or liquid food to solid food that you ate and drank in order to make the minimum volume for an after-blessing.

If Did Not Eat or Drink Minimum

Size: How To Calculate

Ounces: Weight or Volume

The minimum quantity for saying after-blessings is based on volume, not weight. If you eat a pack of pretzels whose volume is 1.3 fl. oz., even though the label says it only weighs 0.5 oz., you would say an after-blessing of al ha'michya.

Figuring Volume

Figuring Volume: Non-Mezonot Foods

You may not include the volume of fish or meat or other foods eaten together with bread or matza in order to reach a total volume of 1 fl. oz., which is required for saying the after-blessing of birkat ha'mazon. However, you may combine the volumes in order to say borei nefashot.

Figuring Volume: Unswallowed Pits/Seeds

When eating foods with seeds or pits (olives, pomegranates, etc.), do not include unswallowed seeds or pits to reach the 1.3 fl. oz. (39 ml, or 1/6 cup) minimum volume needed to say an after-blessing. You may include only what you have swallowed.

D'Oraita Cases

For d'oraita cases (halachot from the Torah), such as eating matza at seder or drinking wine for kiddush, we use a more stringent minimum measure:

• Eat at least 1.9 fl. oz. (56 ml) of solid food within four minutes, or
• Drink at least 4 fl. oz. (119 ml) of liquid within 30 seconds.

Timing

When To Start Counting

You may start counting the period of four minutes (for eating at least 1.3 fl. oz.) or 30 seconds (for drinking at least 3.3 fl. oz.) any time after the fore-blessing as long as it is continuous from when you first swallow until you have swallowed the minimum amount.

Introduction to Fast Days
The purpose of Jewish fast days is to make us reflect on our behavior and improve it by:

• Eliminating negative actions and thoughts, and
• Taking more care in our observance of the commandments.

God told the Jewish people on many occasions that He did not want their pointless sacrifices or fast days but rather wanted the Jews to improve their behavior. If people fast but still have reprehensible behavior, the people have missed the point and purpose of bringing sacrifices and having fast days.
All fast days may be circumvented for health reasons. Consult a rabbi.
Fast days come in several varieties:

• Major fast days: Yom Kippur and the Ninth of Av (Tish'a B'Av). 
• Minor fast days: There are four minor fast days; see below.
• Fast for First-Born
• Individual Fasts

The Major Fasts
Yom Kippur and the Ninth of Av begin before sunset and are both slightly longer than 24 hours. Yom Kippur is a festive day while, on the Ninth of Av, Jews mourn for the destruction of both Jerusalem Temples (the first was destroyed by Babylonians; the second, by the Romans). On both fasts, it is forbidden to:

• Eat or drink.
• Wear leather shoes (but you may wear any other clothing made of leather).
• Bathe (or even to wash anything more than fingers; you may not use a deodorant--not even a spray type--since it is similar to washing).
• Have marital relations.
• Use cosmetics or body scents.

The Minor Fasts
The four minor fasts begin 72 minutes before local sunrise. They technically end at dark but functionally end after ma'ariv (and for the Fast of Esther, after hearing the megila). Unlike most times in the Jewish calendar, this 72 minutes is normal time and NOT based on the current length of the day (sha'a zmanit):

• Fast of Esther (Ta'anit Esther): Day preceding Purim (or sometimes earlier).
• Fast of Gedalia (Tzom Gedalia): Usually the day after Rosh Hashana.
• Tenth of Tevet (Asara b' Tevet):
• Seventeenth of Tamuz (Shiv'asar b'Tamuz): Beginning of the Three Weeks of semi-mourning beforeTish'a b'Av.

On all fast days, eating and drinking are forbidden. The Tenth of Tevet and the Seventeenth of Tamuz additionally have the same restrictions as the Nine Days. So you may wash or bathe on the Fast of Esther and on Tzom Gedalia but not on the Tenth of Tevet and the Seventeenth of Tamuz. (See Nine Days: Restrictions).
Note On a fast day that has been delayed for Shabbat, there may be leniencies for:

• The mohel, sandak, and father of a baby getting a brit mila to eat after mincha.
• Pregnant or nursing women (this leniency applies to eating throughout the day).

Fast for First Born
Fast for first-born males 13 years old and older, on the day before Passover. This includes first-born cohanim and Levites (levi'im). The fast begins 72 normal minutes before sunrise and ends with kiddush at the seder. However, the widespread custom is to attend a siyum on the day before the first seder so that the first-born men do not need to fast on that day.
 
Personal Fasts
Fast by a groom and bride on their wedding day is an example of personal fasts. This fast begins 72 normal minutes before sunrise and ends with drinking wine under the chuppa.

 

1. What Makes a Woman a Nida

 
Introduction to What Makes a Woman a Nida
Vaginal Blood Flow
Only vaginal blood flow makes a woman nida. 
 
Nida D'Oraita
According to Torah law (d'oraita), a woman becomes a nida when she experiences a flow of uterine blood, preceded or accompanied by a hargasha. Because uterine blood flow is difficult to distinguish from the more general vaginal blood flow, we assume that a vaginal blood flow is from the uterus--unless a medical person (it could be a midwife) determines that the blood flow is not uterine.
 
Nida D'Rabanan
 
By rabbinic law (d'rabanan), a woman can become a nida even with only a qualifying stain (see below).

Hargasha
A hargasha is anything that signals that the woman's period is imminent. There are three classical hargashot, as well as possible hargashot that pertain only to an individual woman.
Note Many women today do not have hargashot.
 
Classical Hargashot
There are three classical hargashot:
1) Body Tremor
2) Petichat HaMakor
Some women, at petichat ha'makor (“opening of the uterus”), have a sensation of release similar to when one's bladder opens to urinate.
3) Zivat Davar Lach
Sensation of wet discharge that comes only with her period; this is not the wet discharge that every woman normally feels multiple times daily.
Note She does not necessarily need to feel it coming from her cervix in order for it to make her a nida.
 
Individual Hargashot
What Is an Individual Hargasha
The individual hargasha can be any physiological occurrence (pimples on her face, a bout of yawning, a bloated feeling in the belly, etc.) that correlates with a woman's getting her period within 24 hours. To become established as a hargasha, it must have happened three times in a row.
 
Note Cramps for most women may be a hargasha, since they may mean that the woman is about to have her period.
 
When a woman has a hargasha, we assume that her period has started, and she should immediately stop what she is doing and check internally with a bedika cloth. If she does a bedika as soon as possible and the cloth shows a forbidden color, or shows no discharge at all, she immediately becomes nida for at least 12 days, after which she goes to the mikva. 
Note If she had a hargasha and finds no blood and no discharge, she becomes a nida, since we assume there was blood and she just didn't find it.  If the bedika cloth shows brown, magenta, salmon, brick, amber, orange, etc., the rabbi will want to see the cloth to determine her status.
Note Most medium browns are OK.
 
What To Do If Not Sure
If she is not sure she has had a hargasha, she asks a rabbi and together they will sort out the answer.
 
 
Nida D'Rabanan
 
Stain (without Hargasha)
 
Stain Colors
A rabbi should be consulted in all matters of questionable colors of stains.  Some may seem to you to be forbidden but turn out to be permissible, and vice versa.
 
Stain Location
A stain of a color that could make a woman a nida can be on material or on the woman's body. None of the following lenient conditions apply if the woman is nida d'oraita:
   

1. Not positively attributable to another cause, AND
2. At least the size of a gris. For small, unconnected spots, she must evaluate whether, together, they equal the size of a gris (on material, the spots DO NOT get combined). If yes, she should consult a rabbi.

 
 
II. HARCHAKOT: How Do the Couple Conduct Themselves while the Wife is a Nida?
 
According to Torah law, when a woman is a nida, she and her husband are prohibited not only from having intercourse, but also (“lo tikrav”—Vayikra 18:19) from having any physical contact of a passionate or romantic nature (negiya shel chibuk v'nishuk)--those patterns of physical contact that often lead to intercourse. Since the penalty for violation is kareit, husband and wife should live separately during the nida period, but because we don't, we use “distancers” (harchakot) as reminders of distance while living together in the same home. The harchakot sensitize us to the smallest gestures of love. The couple who know that in a finite amount of time their union will not only be permitted, but even be davar sh'bekedusha--a thing of sanctity--will have the willpower to wait it out.
 
These harchakot are applied during the nida period:
                                 
III. Tahara after Nida:    

1. Wash or cleanse lower regions of the body.
2. Do an internal check/bedika: Insert a white cloth into vagina and circle it around to make sure to get every nook and cranny.
3. Moch dachuk: Insert a bedika cloth within two halachic hours of sunset and leave it in until after dark.

 

1. Bedika

 

2. White Underpants

 

3. No Hesech Da'at

A woman does not need to think about the seven clean days all of the time, but she must keep in mind, during the entire nida purification process, that she is not in an active nida state.  
Situation A woman found a stain and asked a rabbi about it. She assumed she was definitely nida.
What To Do Once she assumes that she has become a nida during that seven-day period, she must begin her count again--even once she has found out that she was not, in fact, a nida. 
Note If she asked the rabbi while not yet assuming that she was definitely a nida, she may continue her original count after the rabbi determines that she was not a nida.

• Full body cast.
• Being covered with sand.
• Being sweaty from head to toe.

• Moisturizer that covers most of her body.
• Adhesive that is left on her skin after a band-aid has been removed.
• Imperfect manicure, if she would not go to an interview like that.

         
 

• Shalom Bayit (in this case, she is not permitted see her husband until after dark Friday night).
• Dangerous Neighborhood.
• Infertility Issues (if she will miss ovulation if she does not go Friday night).

    Kosher immersion/tevila requires simultaneous immersion of every exposed part of the body (not bet ha'starim).   Here is the best way to accomplish simultaneous immersion:

• Enter the water until it is about 12 inches above the navel. 
• Make sure that every part of your body is relaxed (if you squeeze anything, you create crevices and cracks that impede complete access to your skin). 
• “Flesh”/basar is exposed to the water when standing while leaning a little forward.
• Exhale and push yourself under the water until you are certain that all of your body and all of your hair are submerged. 
• Once your head is above the surface of the water, say the blessing and then immerse again, the same way.

 
IV. Anticipating the Next Period/Veset
 
What To Anticipate
In anticipating the time of the month when her period is most likely to occur (onat ha'veset), a woman must determine both:

1. The day of the month, and
2. Whether it will begin during the daytime period (sunrise to sunset) or the nighttime period (from sunset to sunrise)

 
Regular and Irregular
Every woman needs to be able to anticipate her next period, whether she is a) regular or b) irregular. “Regular” is determined by any pattern to one's menstrual cycle that occurs three times in a row.
Note It is very uncommon for a woman to maintain her regular period for a long time.
 
Anticipating a Regular Period
Here are the five most classic regular patterns:

1. Veset HaChodesh (Monthly Cycle)

   

2. Veset Haflaga (Intervals Cycle)

 

3. Veset HaGuf (Body Symptoms Cycle)

 

4. Veset HaMurkav (Combination Cycle)

    A woman with an irregular period may have to abstain from relations and affectionate intimate contact (negiya shel chibuk v'nishuk) during these three onot/time periods:

1. Yom HaChodesh

 

2. Haflaga

 

3. Ona Beinonit